I've got a big but

I realised recently how often in my conversations I use the word but.  It's a limiting, doubting word. "Yes, but..." - we all do it.  I was thinking about not using the word in my writing any more and hadn't got much further than that when an email popped into my inbox with the following link to an interview with Neil Mularkey.

http://www.screwworkletsplay.com/blog/

Tomorrow is the first day of my new life and I'll mark it by being the "Yes, and..." queen.

Oliver's army

"In the meadows of the mind no-one travels so far as he who knows not where he is going" Oliver Cromwell

This is such a reassuring quote.  I don't think it means it's ok to be aimless but more that exploration is a valid exercise in itself.  The meadows image is lovely too. It suggests a calm and centred journey rather than an aggressive mission or quest. 

4,3,2,1......blast off!

I'm at my 4th last working day in the corporate world.  It all feels a bit surreal. 

Last week I had a major wobble.  Announcements of severe Arts Council funding cuts set me off.  Was my new life in the arts about to be curtailed before I'd even started?  Was I completely mad to be giving up my job in such difficult times?  Did I actually have anything I could call a plan?  Could I really take my own advice and follow my heart?  Was I wilfully in denial?  Would my worst fears be realised and would I be eating cat food in my old age?

I managed to calm down, but it was useful to acknowledge and feel these fears.  I'd been doing a very good job of pushing them aside.

With apologies to Janis

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a handsome loving man?
My friends all have partners, I must make amends.
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends,
So Lord, won't you buy me a handsome loving man?

Oh Lord, won't you buy me the work that’s just for me?
Dialing For Dollars is trying to find me.
I wait for delivery each day until three,
So oh Lord, won't you buy me the work that’s just for me?

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a world full of fun?
I'm counting on you, Lord, please don't let me down.
Prove that you love me and buy the next round,
Oh Lord, won't you buy me a world full of fun?

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a handsome loving man?
My friends all have partners, I must make amends,
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends,
So oh Lord, won't you buy me a handsome loving man?

The power of the group

I’m constantly forgetting and then being reminded that I don’t have to go through this career change process on my own.  It’s obvious and good advice that anyone going through change will have ups and downs and that sharing with like minded souls is both reassuring and energising.  People need people!  At a purely selfish level, networking with new people expands opportunities and gets the creative juices flowing.  It’s a two way deal.  Support < --- > Energy & Ideas.

I jokingly wrote in my Argus blog that I was embarking on my own 12 step process of change and that I was going to take myself through it by the scruff of my neck.  I missed the obvious in the metaphor.  Any 12 step programme* works because of the power of the group.

I have some great groups that I am newly a part of and, in my usual fashion, I dilly dally on the edges.  It’s time to jump in and engage.

* I do realise that this is the AA process.  I’ve not experienced it and my 12 steps will be different, but I’m guessing there will be similarities.  And I’m a pragmatic kind of girl so I like the idea of structure and methods that work!    

What's my sentence?

Dan Pink challenges us to sum up what we're about with one sentence.

This is about legacy and what we want our life to be about.  It's a HUGE question and a particularly challenging one for a career changer who has yet to figure out what I want my contribution to the world to be.

What's my sentence?
"She changed her life and showed others how to do it too".

That would be pretty amazing.

http://www.danpink.com/archives/2010/10/whats-your-sentence-the-movie

The long goodbye

The ending has been a long time coming; I'm on the final stretch now.  It's been such an extended leaving (4 months since I handed in my notice) that I've had plenty of time to get used to the idea.  Endings can be strange and anticlimactic so I've decided to mark it twice.  Once with leaving drinks on my last work day and again with a party at home the day after.